7 Truths Mums With ADHD Child Knows
Are you a parent to a child with ADHD? Do you think you are the only one dealing with theses issues? Do you feel judged? What do people think of mums with an ADHD child?
Its like a secret club, if people don’t live with ADHD its easy to build up an idea of what it is like.
But if you don’t live with a children or a adult with it you won’t completely understand.
It can be be very challenging, but it also does have some hilarious moments!
These are what we have found to be The 7 Truths That Mums With An ADHD Child Knows.
Mums With A ADHD Child
Before my son was diagnosed with ADHD i was sure ADHD didn’t exist.
I just thought they were naughty children brought up by bad parenting.
Here are some truths that every mum with an ADHD child knows and can relate to.
1. Your Child Is Known As “That Kid”
ADHD can make your perfect loving child turn into a child that you worry about when taking them out.
Their behaviour could make them look like a naughty and “bratty” child.
With their impulsive behaviours and their emotional breakdowns, you cringe inside.
No mater how well you think you have control, you still feel like you want to crawl into a ball and hide.
2. You Dread Parents Evenings
Parents evenings seem to be a repeat every year.
“Your child is disruptive”,
“he is constantly getting out of his seat”,
“He always fails to hand in his homework”.
You find this very upsetting. who wants to keep hearing bad things from their child’s teacher?
And to have it repeated year after year, it isn’t a nice feeling.
We try to do all we can with them at home, but school just seems like a huge struggle to them.
Most of the time, what they are doing isn’t stimulating enough, so they lose focus.
Do you have problems getting your ADHD Child to school? Here is our experience and advice.
Not Everyone Understands a ADHD Child
3. You Get Upset By How Misunderstood They Are
At school and out of school activities they constantly annoy their friends, teachers and coaches.
We have found the behaviours that our child shows comes across as annoying or silly. These could be because he has lost focus or he is doing these things to be noticed.
Its very hard for children to live with ADHD, and there is nothing harder for a parent watching them struggle with something beyond their control.
Knowing they are not sure how to control it.
You just wish everyone could see the amazing child you see, and give them a little bit of patience.
4. You Have Tried Everything In The Books
You have read so many books, scoured the internet for sources of information, and got advice from people who think they know best.
And you have tried different diets, timetables, schedules and other techniques, but nothing seems to work.
Unless the information you have received comes from a trained professional, take it with a pinch of salt. Everybody has opinions.
The only advice for all parents to listen to is, to take a deep breathe and keep smiling! You are doing a great job.
No matter how hard things get, they are your child.
They haven’t chosen to have ADHD, nor you chose for them to have it. Life can be tricky, but work along side their schools, or CAMHS and develop techniques that work for you both.
5. You Always Repeat Yourself
The amount of time you have to ask them to “put your socks on”,
“clean your teeth” becomes very repetitive.
The constant reminders for them to carry out simple tasks, that they have just forgot about.
It is surprising that you are not bored of your own voice by now!
Why not read our post on How ADHD affects relationships.
6. Your Child Gets Punished In School/After School Activities For Being “Them”
My husband and I now play a little game each week, where we guess how many phone calls/emails we will receive from the school or his after school activities.
All of these are because of his impulsive behaviours or he has had “one of his meltdowns”.
They seem to get a detention at school or get sent home from their activities and they can never seem to understand why.
Most of the time we have found, it is because of not having the understanding of ADHD.
Not knowing how to act and speak to a child who really struggles with certain things.
I do understand it can be very hard for a teacher to teach a class of around 30 boys, and have 1 child lose concentration and then decide to make bird noises.
Or having a child with ADHD struggle to keep focus when he has to copy off the board.
At one of his after school activities, he has to wait for his go on the equipment when it isn’t he’s turn.
Anyone who knows or understands ADHD knows that an ADHD child doesn’t understand turn waiting!
I do understand that not everyone “gets” ADHD, but i think if you know you are teaching/coaching an ADHD child just have a little read up about it.
Living with a ADHD Child
7. You Have To Always Stay Positive And Calm Even When You Are Losing It
As a parent you feel emotional and mentally drained, but you cant let your child know how you are feeling.
You just need to put this false smile on your face and carry on. This works with all children.
But with an ADHD child, if they see that you are getting stressed out or upset, it is quite likely that they will start to get distressed too.
We find by trying to be as calm as possible, we can ensure that he is calm. Then when he goes to bed, we can discuss and see what we can change about what we have done that day.
There are our 7 Truths That Mums With An ADHD Child Knows.
It can be very difficult at times, and if this post comes across like we are just highlighting the negative parts, that is not the intention.
We wouldn’t change Rhys for the world, he is very loving and has a great heart. But sometimes he’s brain runs away with him.
Do you have a child that has ADHD?
If you would like any more information then why not have a look at Alisons’ website ADHDkids
Did we miss anything out?
If so please get in contact and share your story. We would love to hear it.
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